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Bitches

Black vernacular is pervaded with ambiguous expressions and innuendo that are sometimes abstruse, even to those familiar with the locutions of Ebonics, jive talk, and urban phraseology. The word bitch can be perceived as either good or bad, as a complimentary sobriquet or a brazen slander, it’s all a matter of context. Admittedly, I use the word bitch a lot idiomatically to reference unsavory, obtuse, and exasperating males and females. Whether it’s spoken, written, or gestured, language is the primary method of communication amongst most “intelligent” lifeforms. But, when referring to humans I personally use the word intelligent sparsely. People just aren’t very smart, and I think that’s clearly discernible for anyone who’s paying attention. It’s the general inadequacies of the average person that cause me to mistrust people, and most people are observably deficient in competence and reliability. I am an exceptionally cynical person, and at the top of the list of people I distrust the most is bitches. Before I delve intimately into this topic, for the sake of lucidity, I believe it would be sensible for me to elucidate the reasons why I’m so comfortable using a slur to reference this very particular and significant faction of the female gender. If you ask me, a bitch is an unsophisticated, malevolent, insufferable female that lacks morality, dignity, and deference. I’m a realist, and a firm believer of always addressing and referring to people in accordance to their actions and their character. Also, there’s no reward for being politically correct in a society that critiques people for being both too nice or too mean. In addition, I believe there are only two determining factors that divide offensive language from acceptable language, and those factors are context and opinion. Context is the circumstances surrounding a statement or idea that can help provide meaning and clarity to said statement or idea. For example, people often use figurative language to describe objects or actions in a way that, if taken out of context, can be easily misunderstood. If someone says, “That lady has a bad body.”, that could mean one of two things. It could mean “bad” as in awful or “bad” as in awesome, but you’d have to listen to the nuance tone variations in the speaker’s voice, or watch the expression on their face, or see the lady’s body, or ask the speaker to explain exactly what they meant to understand the context. Opinion is simply a person’s personal belief, view, or judgement on something, and to be frank, the only opinions that matter to me are my own. Opinions are ordinarily formed in negation of fact, which renders them ineffectual and extraneous.

The word bitch is a noun that is generally used to describe a vexatious person, place, thing, or situation. Bitch is a very flexible and versatile word, but the main focus of this article will be the type of bitch that’s blatantly and habitually dishonest, that’s vindictive and manipulative, that’s impertinent and crass, that’s disloyal and deceitful, and that’s the type of person that is difficult to like, trust, and concur with. I grew up around all women in a dysfunctional family inundated with mental illness, so I’ve witnessed and experienced a lifetime of unabashed abysmal behavior. When having in-depth conversations with people on thought-provoking subject matter, people notice my sagacity and often suggest that I “must have been raised right”, but that implication is far from accurate. The truth is, I’m a naturally astute person and I’ve been privy to enough objectionable nonsense in my life to the point that I effortlessly recognize the ills and faults in things. I am the person I am despite my flawed family, not because of them! Feeble-minded people are fickle and treacherous, and faithfulness and congeniality are not traits that bitches hold in high regard. Everything I’ve learned about bitches, I’ve learned while observing and interacting with the women close to me, even before I became an adult. In fact, while contemplating in retrospect to my past, I’ve come to understand that my posture in opposition of monogamy stems from observations I’ve made of close relatives audaciously engaging in many transient intimate relationships simultaneously. Not to mention all the reality talk shows, movies, and music I’ve watched and listened to over the years that have all taught me a lot about people, bitches in particular. For as long as I can remember, I’ve taken heed every time I believed there was a lesson to be learned from experiences I’ve had. For instance, I became an atheist at the age of 9, because in years prior I prayed every night and none of my prayers were answered. Then, I read the bible and realized none of it makes sense. Then, I noticed that crazed, overzealous religionists are the type of people that are the most likely to sin. Then, I concluded that people generally look to God for guidance and support when they’re indolent, lethargic, and unwilling to bear the burden of actively working to change their own lives, and also when they’re too pusillanimous to accept reality. So, opposed to having a bitch that’s holy and god-fearing, I’d rather have a woman that’s intelligent, strong, resilient, dignified, vigorous, and vivacious. Because everyone knows sluts and hoes are devoted church attendants! Women and bitches have frequent conflicts amidst each other, because they’re not indisputably indistinguishable and easily mistakable. However, wholesome and chaste women broadly conduct themselves with class and grace, and with such splendor and grandeur that it’s difficult to deny their authenticity. Likewise, respectable women have the perspicacity to seek solace and contentment within themselves, without requiring affirmation or corroboration from a man. Furthermore, responsible women proudly procure the wherewithal to foster and secure their own desires and well-being.

As a person that indulges in cynicism, realism, and individualism, I have many pet peeves. I’m annoyed by people, extensively. I loathe liars, I despise deceivers, I hate haters, I abhor assholes, and a bitch is all these things and more! Fathers are scarce in the black community, and that’s a well-known actuality. But, as a polarity, black women in these communities seem to be inherently promiscuous and extracurricular. I believe the dynamic between bitches and good-for-nothings in black communities is turbulent because of their open and reciprocal intermediate intolerance for each other, which is both sad and bewildering. It’s like bitches fornicate with deadbeats without using contraception specifically to conceive fatherless children and complain about it, and deadbeats screw bitches bareback just to brag about doing it while grumbling about being put on child support. “That nigga ain’t shit!” is an old English proverb nearly every black child in America has heard their mother utter when speaking about their father. And, “I wish I never met that bitch!” is a saying that fathers spew every time their child’s mother is mentioned. It’s like these people live to love to hate each other, and that is farcically asinine! But, this is typical, so is something this stupid that’s routine for so many people considered “normal”? And, if being a stupid bitch is normal, is that what all black women should aspire to be? Is it stupid for me to ask that question, especially while I articulately explain the nonsensical tendencies of the average inner-city black woman? Understand this, young black men who grow up without a positive male role model turn to the streets and seek camaraderie and brotherhood with other misguided guys just like them. Ultimately, they do this because they want to feel loved and accepted. However, there’s no positivity in the streets. Young black women that grow up without a father solicit the comfort and protection they miss out on in the absence of a father from the same young black men that pursue companionship in the streets after being neglected by their fathers. But, these girls are stuck with immature guys that don’t respect them, because every youngster in black communities is unenlightened, and bitches blindly move from one guy to the next in pursuit of support and consolation that they’ll never discover from the disengaged black men that they naively pursue. This is a vicious cycle partly perpetuated by simpleminded bitches that are too doltish to learn from their predecessors’ mistakes. Bitches love to ask, “where all the real niggas at?”. Well, fret no longer because I’m about to answer that question for you, boo. The “real niggas” are as far away from your stupid ass as we can possibly get! If all you wanted was a little dick and attention when you met the guy that knocked you up during a consensual ‘smash and dash’, don’t expect a lot of love and affection when you find out you’re expecting a child with someone who didn’t even care enough about himself to wear a condom during a casual hook up. By the same token, don’t presume a guy that’s distinctly irresponsible, inconsiderate, and unloving to support his child. This is all non-complex, common sense advice. And if you’re wondering why I’m coming at you with such a crazy pitch, it’s because I think a bitch is a bitch!

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