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Everybody’s Stupid, LV

I’ve legally owned and fired just about every type of gun available for civilian consumption. In the world of violence, a gun is just a tool. Another word for penis is tool. And an AR-15 is like a 15-inch penis, it’s overkill! I’m sure most of you don’t know that a .223 caliber projectile, the designated round for the AR-15, has the exact same dimensions as a .22 long rifle bullet. Yes, the .223 ain’t nothing but a “deuce-deuce” on steroids! You want to know something else intriguing? Both the .22 long rifle and .22 magnum rounds are capable of piercing most police-issued body armor. It’s all about velocity. All of the .22 caliber rounds, including the AR’s .223, are small, light-weight projectiles that are fired at high velocities. The faster the bullet is moving, the harder it is to stop it from penetrating. And at close ranges, the AR-15 is certain to due far more damage than is necessary to completely incapacitate a target. No mass shooter firing in a confined space requires an AR-15 to kill its targets! I believe AR-15s are customary in mass shootings because of their effectiveness, ease of use, intimidation factor, and I can’t forget the gun’s legendary reputation. Assault rifles are military personnel’s weapon of choice because they’re tactical, multi-purpose weapons with very few faults. An experienced shooter can reload an AR in less than 3 seconds. And an AR’s common 30-round capacity grants a shooter ample ammo to exact pandemonium at their behest. But again, unfortunately, nobody needs an assault rifle to kill multiple people in rapid succession. Just like any other tool, there are multiple substitutes for the AR-15 that are just as effective. For example, my chosen EDC (everyday carry weapon) is a Glock 19, which comes from the factory equipped with 2 or 3 15-round magazines (depending on the gun’s generation). The Glock 19 is a 9mm. Additionally, Glock sells a 33-round magazine that fits all its 9mm pistols, and anyone can purchase them online, without identification, for approximately $40. Of course, there are aftermarket high-capacity mags available for cheaper prices. As a decent shooter, I can do more damage with my Glock 19 and a 33-round mag than a bad shooter can do with an AR-15 and a 30-round mag! I’m not bragging. Here’s the kicker, there are multiple aftermarket companies that sell enough individual Glock-compatible components to build a complete gun. Anyone can buy slides, barrels, frames, springs, trigger assemblies, magazines, ammo, and everything else necessary to build an untraceable, locked and loaded Glock clone without ever leaving their home! Do y’all really believe making a single tool less accessible is going to stop people from getting the job done?!

Y’all are fucking stupid, but I’ll get to that in the last paragraph. Just for shits and giggles, let’s say Congress manages to implement an all-out ban of all assault rifles, again. What other options would a would-be mass murderer have? Well, I couldn’t find any legitimate statistics with actual numbers, but we all know there are tens of thousands of assault rifles crudely stashed away in bedroom closets and behind pickup truck seats all across America. A ban on assault rifles would certainly place a premium on privately-sold firearms across the country. And with the current recession that everyone is denying exists, who wouldn’t sell their $400 Palmetto State Armory AR-15 to a desperate soul for $1,500?! Did you know that guns are classified as private property in most states? The government can’t prohibit people from selling their private property, so it’s perfectly legal to sell a complete stranger a gun, as long as you are unaware of that person’s legal eligibility to own a firearm. That’s the country you live in, but you think banning the retail availability of assault rifles is somehow, magically going to stop people from obtaining them!? Okay, did you know that both the AR-15 and the AK-47 come in pistol form? Yes, there are long-barreled pistols, which can reasonably be perceived as short-barreled rifles, chambered in the exact same rounds as full-sized rifles. That means the compact, more portable version of an AR-15, that us gun folk call an “AR pistol”, isn’t categorized as a rifle, and therefore would likely not be included in an assault rifle ban. What about shotguns? Do you think a shotgun is capable of inflicting catastrophic, irreparable, fatal wounds? Do you know that there are magazine-fed shotguns that are capable of severing limbs with a single, well-placed shot?! It may sound like I’m glamourizing guns, but I’m not! That feeling you’re experiencing is indignation and aggravation awakened by the realization that your ignorance is a lot more severe than you ever could’ve imagined. And I ain’t even getting down to the nitty-gritty! These are all surface level facts that your stupid-ass either didn’t know or refuse to accept. Mass shooters and school shooters don’t use ARs because they have to, they do it because it’s trendy. And everywhere outside the US, you know what the trend is? Bombs! Random IEDs kill far more people than unprovoked shootings every year. Google it.

If there were 6 million ways to die, how many ways would there be to kill a motherfucker? Again, a gun is just a tool. Blaming AR-15s for mass shootings is like blaming deep fryers for heart disease! If you haven’t heard, heart disease kills more people than all types of violence combined. Why y’all ain’t protesting Crisco? The root of the problem is as clear as today’s cellphone footage—it’s you! Y’all are the fucking problem! Stupidity and mental illness. Y’all don’t respect your children, you refuse to constructively address the causes of your stress and depression, you’re too ill to recognize that your indiscretions promote indispositions in your children, your children are too young to cope with said indispositions functionally, your children lash out and project their insecurities onto other kids, and those other kids get fed up and unleash their wrath via deadly violence. Am I right? But that’s just the politically correct explanation of mental illness for the least dysfunctional version of you imbeciles. In other cases, you egregiously abuse your kids, and they’re too small to fight you back, so they bully other kids so they don’t feel so small. Then, there are the cases where your child was born with a mental illness, they’ve always been violent, and you do everything in your power to pacify the kid’s uncontrollable rage, including lying about all the foul shit that you know the child is justly accused of doing, instead of allowing them to atone for their wrongdoings rightfully. And I can’t forget about all the kids that do everything right, but because they have certain views or lifestyle choices that you disagree with, you toil to make your own child’s life a living hell. How many people do you know that will admit that they’re actively stupid? How many times have people apologized to you for something as simple as hurting your feelings? Can you even count the number of times someone hurt your feelings? Are you strong enough to admit when your feelings are hurt? Will banning guns stop people from wanting to use them? Do you believe that everything has a consequence? I believe mass shootings are the consequence of people’s stupidity. I believe anger is both a symptom of mental illness and a natural and acceptable response to provocation. I believe violence is the only answer to extortionate levels of stupidity. And I believe people are too stupid to ever even come close to seeing how stupid they are. Mass shootings in America will never stop! Because Americans will always be stupid by the masses.

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